Google “Twitter”. There are any number of articles, blogs and ebooks on How to Twitter, The Benefits of Twitter, The Best Ways to Use Twitter. This post is for those of you who need affirmations and justifiable reasons that Twittering isn’t right for you.
1. The most important reason and rationale for not being on Twitter is because while there are many people posting informational links, the aggregation of the latest news, and great motivational “Tweets” in any given hour, someone will inevitably Tweet what they had for breakfast, lunch or dinner. It’s annoying. Stay away.
2. People on Twitter are always asking questions, wanting to get expert opinions and insights. What is up with that? Don’t people know that you could pay good money for a book or a seminar to get the one line of text that you need to answer the question that they have?
3. Twitter is another new school way for building relationships. You’re old school. Even though Twittering would bring you into the beginning of some new widespread influence, you prefer the old school way of doing business. (Now where is that list of businesses to cold call that you made last month?)
4. You wrote a sizzling blog post. People will probably read it just because you hit “Publish”. And you have a monthly newsletter, too! There are those several thousand people who could be instantly informed of your great blog post, and people could possibly “ReTweet” your post notification, but those probably aren’t the people you want reading your posts anyway, right? (You can always announce your great post at next month’s networking meeting you go to also.)
5. The biggest reason not to Twitter? Why would anyone share any information that could benefit anyone else for free? “Sharing is Caring”. Bah, Humbug! on that idea. Why would anyone want to join in on a worldwide conversation, be up to the minute on what people are concerned about, encouraged about, or sharing a laugh about?
Besides, someone might Tweet what they had for breakfast.
Twitter me!
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Great article. one of the funniest I have read in a long time. Great job.
@benhunsaker
Thanks! Twitter, now really…